I wish I lived in a huge city where everyone is not separated by one or two degrees and I had more anonymity. While this isn’t a small place by far I’ve been here awhile now and I know a lot of people who in turn know a lot of people and lately it feels I can’t go anywhere without seeing a) a past client (best behavior at all times) b) someone I know c) meeting someone new and discovering some connection or mutual acquaintances. It feels claustrophobic. I would love to walk into a bar and not know a single soul or get lost in a sea of faces. Not to mention due to the large number of people I work with as soon as you tell someone what you do they know someone who works there or knows someone who knows someone and they start bombarding me with questions or retelling some past incident or worse tell me some sordid tale about them. (One of the manliest guys I work with who just got married is having an affair with my friends gay brother!) I have a conference coming up next week and while I am looking forward to being out of action I am not looking forward to a week with my male colleagues. Seeing as I won’t fuck any of them they seem to feel I am okay enough to confide in me their dirty little secrets. Such as who they are fucking such as other females workers, hookers, our bosses. In some ways it is kinda entertaining especially when at least 10 guys are banging the one girl and all think they are the only one doing so but they are mostly all married and its kinda weird to run into them outside of work with their wives and kids. Sometimes I feel I have become the token ‘I can’t tell anyone else but I feel I can trust you with this’ person. So yes, all in all I feel claustrophobic as hell right now. One way ticket to New York anyone? :P
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